{ just trust }
Tonight I am home from church, sick with an upset stomach. I hate missing church, but for once, I'm glad I did. It gave me the chance to sit here for an hour and spend quality time with my God that my soul has needed for a long while now. I feel like somehow, in sixty minutes, I've grown so much as a Christian and a wife and a mama, and it's all in one "simple" area.
Trust.
Why is trusting God something I struggle so hard with?
I was raised in church. I know God knows all. I know God knows best. I know that all things work together for good to them that love God. I know all these things.
But maybe, for the first time tonight, the knowledge of all these things has wiggled it's way into my soul finally. I feel like I've grasped more of what trusting is, and I feel like I've learned to lean my head and my heart on God's strong arms.
A long time ago, at church camp when I was a teenager, I was given a little tan paper titled "Scriptures to Use Against Satan's Strongholds" by whoever was the speaker that year. Each camper was given one, and I don't know if the rest of them held onto it, but I am so thankful I did. I can't tell you the number of times I've run to that little paper with all it's catergories {anxiety, forgiveness, anger, etc.} and it's helped me to climb a little higher on the ladder to understanding the Lord.
Tonight, for the first time, I read all the verses listed under the catergory "TRUSTING GOD". I don't know why I didn't before, because I've been struggling for a long time now with learning to just trust Him. Maybe I didn't notice it, listed down there on the bottom of the back page. But tonight I did, and I wanted to share some things I've discovered.
"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose...He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give him all things?" [romans 8:28 & 32]
I've had this first verse memorized since I was a little girl...it may have actually been one of the first verses I memorized because we had a movie where this family made up a song of the verse to memorize it, and we borrowed that movie from the church library a lot. But not until recently has the true meaning hit home. All things work together for good. All things. Every single thing that happens in my life happens for my good. Even the "bad" things. All things.
The second verse was one that hit me tonight as I struggled with trusting my family to God. I thought I had done this already. But I realized that I wasn't fully giving them to God, especially Reuben and this unborn baby. I wanted to be the mama bear, the protector, the one who wouldn't let anything happen to her little cubs. I've been feeling so aggressive this way that it was making me afraid to die. Because if I'm not around to take care of my babies and my husband, who will do it?
And this verse made me realize that God will. Even if I'm not around, even if something should happen in this unpredictable life that would take me away from them, I could die in peace knowing my God will take care of my family. He did what was best for His Son. He did what was best for "us all". He knows. Which leads me to the next verse.
"Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not to thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." [proverbs 3:5 & 6]
Yet another verse that I, like most Christians, have memorized. It's the verse we all have pop into our minds when it comes to trusting God. Tonight, I looked at it from new angle. "...lean not to thine own understanding...". Stop trying to figure it all out and do it all. Simple as that. I think I'm beginning to see that trusting in God sometimes means shutting down our brains and saying "OK, God, I'm trusting. Why should I have to figure out what you already know?"
And you know what? You don't. The biggest truth I learned tonight is the last one I want to talk about.
"He is the Rock, his work is perfect: for all his ways are judgement: a God of truth and without iniquity, just and right is he." [deuteronomy 32:4]
His work is perfect.
So why do we question? Why do we complain? Why do we cry? Why do we get frustrated with God when he "won't answer"? Because we don't truly believe that His work is perfect. We don't trust Him enough. But trust is simple. It's believing what we read in the Bible and what we've seen God do in our lives and knowing in our hearts that no matter what may happen it is perfect for us. Because we don't serve a God of imperfections. He's perfect even though we aren't. Life is about trusting in the fact that God is perfect and everything He does is perfect.
Someday, I may write a post about imperfections in my life and how I'm learning to embrace them, but I won't go into that today.
Today is a day for learning to just trust. He loves you. He knows. And He's perfect.
just trust.
Trust.
Why is trusting God something I struggle so hard with?
I was raised in church. I know God knows all. I know God knows best. I know that all things work together for good to them that love God. I know all these things.
But maybe, for the first time tonight, the knowledge of all these things has wiggled it's way into my soul finally. I feel like I've grasped more of what trusting is, and I feel like I've learned to lean my head and my heart on God's strong arms.
A long time ago, at church camp when I was a teenager, I was given a little tan paper titled "Scriptures to Use Against Satan's Strongholds" by whoever was the speaker that year. Each camper was given one, and I don't know if the rest of them held onto it, but I am so thankful I did. I can't tell you the number of times I've run to that little paper with all it's catergories {anxiety, forgiveness, anger, etc.} and it's helped me to climb a little higher on the ladder to understanding the Lord.
Tonight, for the first time, I read all the verses listed under the catergory "TRUSTING GOD". I don't know why I didn't before, because I've been struggling for a long time now with learning to just trust Him. Maybe I didn't notice it, listed down there on the bottom of the back page. But tonight I did, and I wanted to share some things I've discovered.
"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose...He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give him all things?" [romans 8:28 & 32]
I've had this first verse memorized since I was a little girl...it may have actually been one of the first verses I memorized because we had a movie where this family made up a song of the verse to memorize it, and we borrowed that movie from the church library a lot. But not until recently has the true meaning hit home. All things work together for good. All things. Every single thing that happens in my life happens for my good. Even the "bad" things. All things.
The second verse was one that hit me tonight as I struggled with trusting my family to God. I thought I had done this already. But I realized that I wasn't fully giving them to God, especially Reuben and this unborn baby. I wanted to be the mama bear, the protector, the one who wouldn't let anything happen to her little cubs. I've been feeling so aggressive this way that it was making me afraid to die. Because if I'm not around to take care of my babies and my husband, who will do it?
And this verse made me realize that God will. Even if I'm not around, even if something should happen in this unpredictable life that would take me away from them, I could die in peace knowing my God will take care of my family. He did what was best for His Son. He did what was best for "us all". He knows. Which leads me to the next verse.
"Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not to thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." [proverbs 3:5 & 6]
Yet another verse that I, like most Christians, have memorized. It's the verse we all have pop into our minds when it comes to trusting God. Tonight, I looked at it from new angle. "...lean not to thine own understanding...". Stop trying to figure it all out and do it all. Simple as that. I think I'm beginning to see that trusting in God sometimes means shutting down our brains and saying "OK, God, I'm trusting. Why should I have to figure out what you already know?"
And you know what? You don't. The biggest truth I learned tonight is the last one I want to talk about.
"He is the Rock, his work is perfect: for all his ways are judgement: a God of truth and without iniquity, just and right is he." [deuteronomy 32:4]
His work is perfect.
So why do we question? Why do we complain? Why do we cry? Why do we get frustrated with God when he "won't answer"? Because we don't truly believe that His work is perfect. We don't trust Him enough. But trust is simple. It's believing what we read in the Bible and what we've seen God do in our lives and knowing in our hearts that no matter what may happen it is perfect for us. Because we don't serve a God of imperfections. He's perfect even though we aren't. Life is about trusting in the fact that God is perfect and everything He does is perfect.
Someday, I may write a post about imperfections in my life and how I'm learning to embrace them, but I won't go into that today.
Today is a day for learning to just trust. He loves you. He knows. And He's perfect.
just trust.
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